I initially published the following on March 18, 2021 on this blog. I believe this was a time where I hadn’t shared the link of the blog to anyone, and even so, I likely made it private right away so no one could read it if the stumbled upon the link anyways. It’s a topic that I have been batting around my head a bit recently, and possibly something I want to build on in the future. Therefore dear reader, I am sharing it again. I am editing it a little bit, as I can’t stand anything I have written that is over 2 years old usually. Please understand.
Something I’ve always found peculiar in Japan is that I have always felt less barriers and more acceptance from Japanese people the less Westernized they are. The more Western a person is, (I’m defining this as has lived overseas, has placed importance on studying English, or just has a general interest in Western things) the more likely they will ask me the following questions or say the following things when meeting me:
“Your Japanese is very good.”
“When are you planning on going back to your country?”
“Why do you like Japan?”
Conversely, for the most part, Japanese people who have no specific interest in the West, do not like English, nor especially want to be internationalized themselves have always made statements more like this:
“Why haven’t you naturalized?”
“You should really be doing X”
I’ll start with an example of the latter:
I was visiting my ex-wife’s brother’s volunteer firefighter group 10 years ago. They wanted me to join, saying that it would be fun, and that I should really help out. I muttered how I’m not Japanese and therefore there’s probably a rule against it.
Without missing a beat more than one were shocked that I hadn’t become Japanese, or that I didn’t want to become Japanese.
“You plan on living here forever, right? Just become Japanese!”
Another time I was in a local festival with them, and two young representatives from a local company were there, one of them being a beautiful woman. It turned out I had mutual friends with her colleague, and from there I was chatting with her a little bit.
From there 4 or 5 boisterous volenteer firefighters came out of nowhere happily saying:
“Talking to a cute girl, eh? You shouldn’t do that! We’ll tell your wife! Come on! Let’s go! Time for you to lift the mikoshi!”
Now an example of the former:
Just yesterday (note from now me: this would be March 17, 2021), my wife and I visited relatives of hers, and these people were some of the nicest people that I have ever met. I am really hoping that we can continue a close relationship with them. We were visiting my wife’s great-aunt, who is in her 90s, and my wife’s aunt- in her 60s was also there. Making conversation with someone in their 90s for those not used to it isn’t easy, and the aunt kept on leading the conversation from behind, making it easy to talk, but never talking too much. Her Japanese can only be described as beautiful, speaking in perfect manner that I thought only existed in textbooks.
However, I was taken out of my surroundings with questions from her about when we would be moving back, how my wife must have amazing English and how Japanese is very hard (my wife doesn’t speak English yet), and despite the aunt being a very very nice woman, with these questions I suddenly felt much more distance with her than I did with the volunteer firefighters.
To me the reason for this seems apparent, and it has nothing to do with racism, xenophobia, maliciousness or anything like that. She has had experience with westerners in her life, and most of them could not speak Japanese, if they were male with a wife, the wife spoke fluent English, and for the most part they did not want to stay in Japan longterm/had some sort of animosity towards Japan. In anticipating this, and allowing me to talk about things I would want to in ways I would want to, she asked the questions she asked, and talked the way she did.
It’s all super interesting.
And now in hindsight dear reader, I do wonder if I missed something in my original analysis. What if it was merely the difference between a traditional working class/countryside attitude and a middle class attitude? Are middle class people more likely to have an interest in English and affinity to the West?
I’m not sure, and I’m not going to think of or find the answer on this lovely Sunday evening (please note again dear reader, this post script was written months ago from today in July 2025). I shall perhaps put this all back on the shelf to sit and stew, but on the semi-public shelf, where people who stumble upon this blog are privy to see it.
Klingsor's First Winter 